Cruel to be kind...
No, this is not some sort of sick relationship banter being referred to in the title today. Professor and I had a very good evening together last night, and at one point we were singing the song, "Cruel to Be Kind" by (I believe) Nick Crenshaw. It was goofy and sweet and pretty much sums the two of us up.
So, Darren is right--Professor kept saying over and over, "This is getting dangerous." At first he was referring to the heavy petting going on, knowing full well I wasn't planning on having (nor did I have)sex. I plan on having sex with Professor, SERIOUSLY, but not last night. As I told him, I don't want to feel rushed like I would on a school night. Anyway, later the danger he was concerned about had to do with his feelings for me. Yes. He has feeling for me! He doesn't like to admit it, but he does. In fact, he even at one point told me that he really likes me and wants to be with me, but just can't right now (And I told him earlier in the evening, he isn't in ready to be in an exclusive relationship). Again later, he said, "Miss Bethie, I can't get over the feelings I have for you. I hate even saying that. This isn't supposed to be happening just now. And if you don't feel the same, that is okay. Don't say you feeling it too, just because I said it."
Wow.
After a loooong pause, I told him I really like him, too. I mean, I already knew that (DUH!) but I know he is going to continue dating other people. And I know he has to. I said as long as I am always in the top 3, that is fine. (Not really, but what else can I say at this point?) We had some deep conversations, mostly about him, but about me as well. He told me I can stop being right everything anytime I want. Oh, and at one point, he did refer to me as his girlfriend, then quickly added, "Not that we are exclusive!"
OH! And this little guy, who is only 15 pounds heavier than me, even though he is about 8 inches taller, carried me to the bedroom. It was HOT!
I told him that while we agreed that we are both dating other people, I am not the kind of girl who has sex with more than one man at a time. He asked if that meant I wasn't going to ever have sex with him. I assured him that no, what I mean is, he can do whatever he wants, but I am only going to be having sex with him, unless another man steals my heart and I decide to pursue that relationship. Should that time ever come, I will let him know, and he can decide if he wants to continue dating me or not.
And I was relieved to find out he hasn't been with anyone else at this point.
OF COURSE I still have some trepidation, and OF COURSE I am going to date anyone one else who is interesting and wants to go out. But, I am also really liking this guy, and want to see where this wild ride takes me. (Yes, I know this all sounds disjointed, but it is my frame of mind at this point.)
So, Darren is right--Professor kept saying over and over, "This is getting dangerous." At first he was referring to the heavy petting going on, knowing full well I wasn't planning on having (nor did I have)sex. I plan on having sex with Professor, SERIOUSLY, but not last night. As I told him, I don't want to feel rushed like I would on a school night. Anyway, later the danger he was concerned about had to do with his feelings for me. Yes. He has feeling for me! He doesn't like to admit it, but he does. In fact, he even at one point told me that he really likes me and wants to be with me, but just can't right now (And I told him earlier in the evening, he isn't in ready to be in an exclusive relationship). Again later, he said, "Miss Bethie, I can't get over the feelings I have for you. I hate even saying that. This isn't supposed to be happening just now. And if you don't feel the same, that is okay. Don't say you feeling it too, just because I said it."
Wow.
After a loooong pause, I told him I really like him, too. I mean, I already knew that (DUH!) but I know he is going to continue dating other people. And I know he has to. I said as long as I am always in the top 3, that is fine. (Not really, but what else can I say at this point?) We had some deep conversations, mostly about him, but about me as well. He told me I can stop being right everything anytime I want. Oh, and at one point, he did refer to me as his girlfriend, then quickly added, "Not that we are exclusive!"
OH! And this little guy, who is only 15 pounds heavier than me, even though he is about 8 inches taller, carried me to the bedroom. It was HOT!
I told him that while we agreed that we are both dating other people, I am not the kind of girl who has sex with more than one man at a time. He asked if that meant I wasn't going to ever have sex with him. I assured him that no, what I mean is, he can do whatever he wants, but I am only going to be having sex with him, unless another man steals my heart and I decide to pursue that relationship. Should that time ever come, I will let him know, and he can decide if he wants to continue dating me or not.
And I was relieved to find out he hasn't been with anyone else at this point.
OF COURSE I still have some trepidation, and OF COURSE I am going to date anyone one else who is interesting and wants to go out. But, I am also really liking this guy, and want to see where this wild ride takes me. (Yes, I know this all sounds disjointed, but it is my frame of mind at this point.)
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