Trying to remember I am the adult here...
So, last week, I was trying to keep up my status as Super Aunt. It is a tough gig, but one I truly love.
A family friend has this gorgeous pool with more toys and games Madonna--although her games and toys are of a completely different nature. I had planned on taking the kids over there one day. Many things happened, including my brother calling the night before, when I was at the evening job, to change things around, and then my nephew getting grounded that morning and now being allowed to go. It was also almost 100 degrees that day.
Eventually, we make it to the friend's place at 9:30am. She had ice cream for us, beverages and had her 9 year old grandson over to play as well. She threw coins for them to dive for, had the waterslide going and generally made it very hospitable for us.
I told her we would leave at noon so we could make it home for some lunch. At 11:30, I reminded her she had a half hour. At 11:45 I told her to wrap it up. At noon she got out and dried off and we said our "thank you's" and left. After sitting in the heat for 2 and a half hours, I was beat and had a throbbing headache, but I didn't mind, just so long as my niece had a great time.
She then decided to not talk to me for the rest of the day. While at my parent's house, having lunch, she didn't talk or make eye contact. While mom and I fed the baby, she said with her back to us and stared at the wall. When my brother picked her up, she gave my mom a hug and said good-bye, and I got completely snubbed, and never thanked for taking her swimming. (She did thank my friend, luckily, or else I would have beaten the snot out of her).
I was so mad, I could have spit nails.
I am the one who takes the kids out for fun all the time.
I am the one who finds activities, tutors for free on my own, very precious time, and I am the one always trying to get their mom to lighten up on them.
I am just not used to pouty girls. That wasn't my style at the age of 11, and my mom would have slapped me silly if I have ever treated an aunt that shabbily.
Oh well, she'll come around...and then I may just be too busy to take them out for fun for a week or two. ;)
A family friend has this gorgeous pool with more toys and games Madonna--although her games and toys are of a completely different nature. I had planned on taking the kids over there one day. Many things happened, including my brother calling the night before, when I was at the evening job, to change things around, and then my nephew getting grounded that morning and now being allowed to go. It was also almost 100 degrees that day.
Eventually, we make it to the friend's place at 9:30am. She had ice cream for us, beverages and had her 9 year old grandson over to play as well. She threw coins for them to dive for, had the waterslide going and generally made it very hospitable for us.
I told her we would leave at noon so we could make it home for some lunch. At 11:30, I reminded her she had a half hour. At 11:45 I told her to wrap it up. At noon she got out and dried off and we said our "thank you's" and left. After sitting in the heat for 2 and a half hours, I was beat and had a throbbing headache, but I didn't mind, just so long as my niece had a great time.
She then decided to not talk to me for the rest of the day. While at my parent's house, having lunch, she didn't talk or make eye contact. While mom and I fed the baby, she said with her back to us and stared at the wall. When my brother picked her up, she gave my mom a hug and said good-bye, and I got completely snubbed, and never thanked for taking her swimming. (She did thank my friend, luckily, or else I would have beaten the snot out of her).
I was so mad, I could have spit nails.
I am the one who takes the kids out for fun all the time.
I am the one who finds activities, tutors for free on my own, very precious time, and I am the one always trying to get their mom to lighten up on them.
I am just not used to pouty girls. That wasn't my style at the age of 11, and my mom would have slapped me silly if I have ever treated an aunt that shabbily.
Oh well, she'll come around...and then I may just be too busy to take them out for fun for a week or two. ;)
posted by Beth at
9:40 PM
6 Comments:
Bethie - if I was her Mom I'd slap her silly. I would be appalled if my girls acted that way to someone who goes out of their way to see that they have a good time. My guess is she feels completely comfortable with you - she feels "safe" to act that way and knows you'll still love her. I'd say, have a little talk some time, when the time seems right. Bring up the bahavior and let her know that when she acts like that, it makes you not want to do fun things with/for her. Good luck!
By
Anonymous, at 7:35 AM
Her mom would really be upset and discpline her if she knew. My mom did mention it, but I am not sure they had the full idea of just how snotty she was.
And really, she is a good kid. And I do think you are right, both kids are very comfortable around me and both know I love them unconditionally. If you saw how we all interact, you wouldn't believe we have only been a "family" for just a little more than a year.
Do your girls ever get pouty? I was laughing this morning with the friend whose pool we used that my education has me able to deal with autism, bi-polar, bullies, and a litany of emotional/psychological problems, but I was never taught how to deal with pouty girls!
By
Beth, at 9:01 AM
Pouty? Never. Well o.k. Maybe once in awhile, or most days...if you have to know the truth! Right now my biggest problem with them is the bickering back and forth and nitpicking, poking, etc. with the accompanying screams and squeals. Drives me up a wall. As for pouty -I try to ignore it. I don't want to reinforce the behavior by even acknowledging it.
By
Anonymous, at 12:11 PM
Well, that was my thought, and that is what I have been doing.
She was snotty to me again today, and even grandma had to tell her she was bossy!
(See...it isn't just me!)
By
Beth, at 3:58 PM
What did you say - she is 11 going on 21?
My dear Jessie is like that at times. She is usually a very sweet, caring child but when the mood strikes, look out!
There are times I would swear she was PMSing but she isn't, yet, anyway!
Patty, how old are your children? boys? girls?
Beth,
I would just have a little talk with her and ask her what was wrong. She probably didn't want to leave because she was having so much fun. But, talk to her about it...without her mom knowing.
By
Anonymous, at 6:29 AM
Actually, the 11 year old is still snubbing me.
If I talk to her, she'll tell her mom. She tells her mom EVERYHTING.
Her mom hates St. Louis tap water and wants the baby to drink only bottled water. My mom gives her tap water (It has flouride, and since the 11 year has already had to have 2 root canals, a little flouride would be good for the kids!). The 11 year old tells on my mom. She also tells when we don't feed the baby everything from her baby food jars (she gets 3 jars per meal, and we often give her her puffs or Cheerios, too. She gets full and stops eating. Why over feed a baby whose weight is healthy?) and if the baby cries, there is a report. My mom told the 11 year old hse has become a bossy little girl. Yep--she told her mom. Mine did not apologize for it. She said it sternly, but after saying what the 11 year old has going for her, and that she doesn't want bossy to become a habit.
By
Beth, at 8:37 AM
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